The gerbils

In March I came round from my 2nd major operation in the space of 24 hours a little bemused and bewildered. The thing that especially confused me was I had a pipe running out of my head. Funnily enough it wasn't the presence of the pipe that bothered me it was that about 2 inches above where the pipe exited my now partially shaved head, I had a dressing and what appeared to be staples in my scalp. It was like I'd been the victim of an office rage incident. I asked the loved ones why I had this hole in my head which was stapled (yep did i mention it was a hole?) and it was obvious that they didn't have a clue. Then knowledgeable and matter of fact big sister said 'that's the hole where they swapped over your brain gerbils'. Call me daft (my excuse was I'd just had brain surgery) but I was quite pleased with the idea that a new set of gerbils were now powering the wheel inside my head. It has made it easier to laugh this time round when the fluid built up, that the gerbils are the cause. My consultant has returned and now I learn something new, gerbils are creatures that require stealth and patience to train. His cunning plan is to wait and watch the pesky things and make sure they don't go back to their old tricks. This involves plenty of CAT scans. I sense a flaw with this cos surely it is unlikely we will spot the gerbils because of course they will be scared of the CAT. The odd MRI scan is thrown in for good measure to try and catch them off guard. So far they're lying low: probably out of it on the drugs! Last week I did try and eject them orally but to be honest I just felt totally crap and got bum injections for my troubles. And so we wait, if the gerbils pee less and my head doesn't fill up then I'll get to go home sooner, if they don't my lesser spotted consultant will be going into my head on a big game hunt and setting a trap for the little critters. Only time will tell. Either way I'm cool though would prefer not to have another shaved portion of hair when the other bits only ust growingback. Off now for a mid morning snooze , see if I can hear any squealing or scrabbling noises. x.