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Saturday, 1 August 2015

A missed deadline

One of my champion supporters is leaving me, the UK and is off to start an adventure of grand proportions and I confess to mixed emotions of being thrilled and excited for her combined with the more selfish reaction of knowing I will miss her company greatly but also miss the comfort and reassurance she always offers me when days aren't so good.
Early on when I was locked in my hospital bed she Was one of my many frequent visitors but who often used to just stick her head round on her way home from work which was just round the corner from NHNN and the cheery smile and kit Kats she used to bring were a beacon of sunshine plus she has a unrivalled access to good reading material which comes in very handy when you spend as much time in bed as I did. She was my escort into london when I started going back in for work, got me Audio books to practise my cognitive listening skills and is all round good egg but it's very cool that she's going to try something different, I'm even a little jealous. So we have established I am going to miss her but no doubt with the world of technology we now live that Skype, face time and FB means that we will stay in touch better then old.

Over the years I have become familiar with this parting from a lot of my Dear friends, It seem I make friends with a lot of people who subsequently go to live overseas and it's always bittersweet to say adieu... Australia. Ibiza. Switzerland. France. USA. Dubai. All good places to visit but not quite as easy to get or give a loved one a quick hug. But to all those far flung friends I celebrate your sense of adventure and life is so much sweeter knowing we have great places marked to visit with lovely people.

To say goodbye and farewell before she flies a party was held and whilst there the husband of one friend noted that I hadn't blogged recently, and why not? Well it was very gratifying to hear that he had even read my blog but he then set me a challenge to update it. Which I subsequently missed. Just one more missed deadline. Now I could have sat down and written something at the time but to be fair I didn't have much new to tell or share. My reality is that I have learnt and accepted that none of the parts of my brain that took the hit when it popped will ever heal and I think I have pretty much come to terms with that now. I have crafted and grafted to get a new level of balance and ability that works for me and family life even if that pretty means zero social life and bed by 9.30 most nights. I get checked out regularly by my neuro team who congratulate me on how far we have travelled but like everyone else in their life travels, I can only do what I can do and for me now that seems to mean staying in a pretty steady but slow phase of recovery. Its just A question of waiting to watch and see what it reveals this time. However that state makes for pretty boring blog updates so far better to speculate on how everyone else is doing and revel in the exciting adventures they are having. My time will come; albeit probably wearing sunglasses , earplugs and cool hat!!

Often a lull or even a backward step has been followed by something else coming on line. I speculate that the brain whilst laying down new pathways sets aside and conserves some extra energy to deliver it, a little like overnight lane closure that go on for months for roadworks improvement. So we shall see if something new is revealed. Maybe a super power. That would be nice. adequate Negotiation Skills to deal with a teenager would also be nice.

So Mr Cerrone I apologise for my missed deadline but I am still curious to know what the Gardener saw. Mrs Rees please have fun and enjoy the desert. And to all those who settle down with me and read this over a coffee, thanks for continuing to come along as I learn to live with this rewiring. It's an evolution every day but doing it in your company is so much easier than battling alone.