Brain versus pain

When I was a little girl I dreamed of becoming an architect. I wanted to design. It never happened and I have ended up doing a variety of jobs since then. Reflecting on my career (having time on my hands since the brain pop) I realise all my jobs to date have given me opportunity to come up with different ways of doing things and ideas and solutions and it that I love. So I guess I am an architect of ideas!

Over the last 12 days I have been sick as 3 sick dogs in this fine London hospital but I have spent time thinking about what I would redesign to improve hospital life rather than wallowing in the pain.Imagine how pleased I was when I discovered my bed neighbour, as well as being very tolerant about Jurassic Poos headed her way, is an architect and artist. Pain can be distracted I have learnt by good conversation,ideas and of course morphine and I have had plenty of all three. So hats off to Doodle girl and here is our top 3 redesign ideas.

1. The chair commode. This unisex contraption has a small gap between disposable bowl and seat. Boys, you have the advantage here with your multi directional wee stick. Girls, its not good news if you're busting. I'm on fluids IV so have pressure equivalent to a water mains pipe, this means I always find the gap and can spray down my legs before you can say 'please nurse'. My suggestion is simple, make the bowls fit the gap and deeper; trust me it's not a spa treatment to sit in a bidet of your own wee even if you haven't had a warm bath in days..

2. Bedside cabinets in hospitals are rubbish, lots of hard to reach cupboards and a shelf that everything falls off the back of. Hospital big wigs, what we need is plenty of different size sliding trays and hanging pegs. I have spent a lot of time recently clawing around for stuff that falls out and frankly I think there are better forms of occupational therapy. Im sure IKEA have just the thing and would do a deal.

3. Noise reduction sleeping ear muffs. All patients should be given ear protectors that are soft enough to sleep in but up to the job of muffling those 'aiaiai's' that turn up a decibel at night. Thanks to beloved husband I have F1 ear plugs already but frankly they're as much use as a Eskimo in the desert.

So that's my top 3. feel free to add your hospital environment improvement ideas. Who knows might get somewhere. Thank you for taking the time to keep me company in hospital and to read this ramble.